I'm finishing up my first go round with edits from Whisk, aka the Wife. And I thought I would share a few of the comments from the pages. Most are harmless.
Cool Beans
Yuck
Good Name
The there are others that are a bit more distracting.
Butt brothers? That would explain why Buzzard hasn't nailed Chola.
A little farther down the page.
Ah. So she might get nailed yet.
People who only know the Mad About You show will get the next one.
Bounce? Why do you gotta say bounce?
Then she has notes on a separate sheet of paper.
This part could be better. Rewrite. Make it less crappy.
Regina get mentioned as being part of a guild, but before we learned she is a server. Wait. Now I'm confused. See me in person for this one, preferably without pants.
Yup. All in red pen. I think I could sell this version for more than the clean version.
PDF
The art of writing is in the rewrite, they say.
ReplyDeleteNo, boring is definitely not a word that applies.
ReplyDeleteWhat? This from a woman who won't let pictures of scantily clad women into The Manor!? :O
ReplyDeleteWhisk!
ROFL
Just so you know, I will never give you a note while proofreading your stuff that asks you to appear without pants. Never. Never ever.
ReplyDeleteYou say that, but I still don't believe you.
DeleteI never wear pants when I game. Never ever.
DeleteI will no longer feel bad about ANYTHING I've said in an edit. She's brutally honest.
ReplyDelete
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