Sunday, March 4, 2012

Sleestak Sunday News Report

Thanks, Jim Bob the Knob.  In other news, two sleestak were spotted at a delicatessen on the corner of Grumpy Av and Alice.  One  brandished a crossbow at the worker behind the counter.  When the worker could not understand their order the sleestack became agitated and threw a net over the clerk.  What ensued was the sleestak walking in slow motion while the clerk ran for help.  While no one got hurt these sleestak are armed and believed to be dangerous.

Here is a police composite of one of the sleestak.  Many of the eyewitness accounts say they were distracted by flying crystals.  Police believe this may have been a diversion tactic.  If you have any information please call your local authorities.  Do not approach them or take matter into your hands.   

Now back to Jim Bob the Knob.

Thanks Karen.  And a..hrmm...that's Jim Kabob.  It looks like Weather Pup is standing by with today's forcast.

Weather sucks!


This report has been interrupted to remind you that


  1. Hahaha! That sleestak button makes me think "Who's got two thumbs and likes to hiss a lot? ThIs guy!"

  2. Thank you for this important news report. We humans need to be well-informed in order to keep ourselves safe from sleestak-related crime and violence.

    Watch out for those crystals!

  3. This weekend five sleestaks involved in hunting-related incidents.

    Now sports.

    And is it me or does the sleestak in the badge look like he's doing a Fonz impression?

  4. Crime and punissssssssssssssssssshment.

  5. In that last pic it almost reads 'SLEESTAKS RULE 1'. What would the first rule of Sleestaks be?

    1. Porky: the first rule of Sleestaak fight club is that no one talks about Sleestak fight club. Which is easy since they lack vocal abilities.

  6. It was very nice to come home and read this. So funny.