Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Random Middle of Work Question Cause I'm Tired of Doing Paperwork

Quick, if you were a monster what would it be and why?

 I know its not original or that interesting, but its all I got.  The one I like the best I'll send a mini manor for your trouble.

Shh, time to get back to paperwork.


  1. Pirate King
    No. Enc.: 1 (see below)
    Alignment: Chaotic
    Movement: 120' (40')
    Armor Class: Armor type
    Hit Dice: 1
    Attacks: 1
    Damage: 1d6 or weapon type
    Save: F1
    Morale: 6
    Hoard Class:XXII
    XP: 10

    "Any horde of 300 or greater is led by a Pirate King (fighter of 11th level)."


  2. Centaur - good with a bow, can run away quickly, popular with the ladies...

  3. A Gold Dragon

    Why? Because it's a Gold Freakin' Dragon, that's why!

  4. Easy-peasy.

    Storm Giant, above water version from LL. 15 HD, 8d6 damage, 22' tall, live in a remote location in an immense luxurious castle, with 2d4 griffons for pets/guards, summon thunderstorms, cast lightning bolts (damage equal to giant's hp, so an average of about 67-68 per blast).

    Isolated enough that there's little to annoy them.
    Badass enough to smoosh anything that does.

  5. A terasque. I'm frustrated at work right now and I just want to tear everything appart! ;-D

    1. LOL Oh god, I wish I one as well. I would fix the office in seconds...

  6. A sort of hybrid of cephalopods and social insects--a colony of tiny blue octopus bees.

  7. A modron...and I would create more paperwork opportunities for you.

  8. An Effreeti.. Just because they looked so damn cool on the 1st Ed DM guide.. Those covers always infused me with a sense of adventure!

  9. I would want to be something horribly terrifying --- like a lycanthrope werewolf fire giant hurling flaming chunks of magma or one of the demon princes with a flying V guitar tossing off hot licks while killing paladins... but in reality I would probably just be a 2 hp goblin armed with bad breath and a sharpened stick.

  10. Hey guys, some of your address I know, some I don't. Please email me at elder_sensa(at)yahoo(dot)com so I can send out some mini manors to you all. Work sucked and this did not. I enjoyed the answers. Although their would have been a bonus for those who would have chosen sleestak.

  11. Tim.. I was just glad we improved your day!